


testing, testing,

by daddymichaelis



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Angst, Depressing Themes, Eventual Smut, Fluff, High School AU, M/M, Self-Harm, Smut, i dont know where im going with this, i have a vague plan but nothing more, its the most stereotypical thing but fuck u
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-06
Updated: 2015-04-30
Packaged: 2018-02-28 09:26:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2727263
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daddymichaelis/pseuds/daddymichaelis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>i'm just suggesting, you and I might not be the best thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Touch

**Author's Note:**

> hi! this is another stereotypical ciel is a nerd & seb is the hot new kid that immediately takes an interest in ciel
> 
> but it has a little twist.

Humming softly to himself, his eyes flitted from the textbook to his notebook and back, and he sighed, leaning back and dropping his pen. He stretched backwards in his chair, his back and shoulders popping. The teen ran a small hand through his hair, before popping his knuckles. He grabbed his phone to check the time, not at all surprised when the screen announced it was 4:06 AM. He sighed, hauling himself out of his desk chair and collapsing into bed, putting in his headphones, curling in a ball. The small teen fell into a light and fitful sleep, spending most of the two hours he had to sleep tossing and turning, searching for a cooler spot on the bed, trying to manipulate his body into a comfortable position.

 

His phone rang at 6 AM, which gave him enough time to shower and finish his homework before walking to school. Begrudgingly dragging himself out of bed and to the bathroom, he hopped in the shower, singing under his breath quietly. He finished the shower quickly, clambering out and drying himself off, tugging on a tank top with a baggy blue sweater on top and black skinny jeans, towel drying his hair as he walked back to his room. He heard his phone vibrate on the bed, and he sighed, leaning over to grab it.

 

_[text message from: lil bitch Alois]_

_6:39 AM_

_yo yo sugartits you comin to school today_

 

**[text message to: lil bitch Alois]**

**6:40 AM**

**why the fuck are you texting me so early**

 

He sighed, rolling his eyes, tossing his phone back onto the green and blue comforter, turning and sitting at his desk, opening the geometry textbook again. The phone buzzed again, and he audibly groaned, turning and snatching it off the bed.

 

_[text message from: lil bitch Alois]_

_6:42 AM_

_daMn ciel chill bitch_

 

The teen just set it aside, trying to concentrate on the work that was due first period. He worked until his alarm went off, telling him it was 7:15, and time to head out. He tugged on his knee-high combat boots, lacing them up and shoving the textbook and binder into his messenger bag, slinging it over his shoulder before jogging down the stairs and out the door, skipping breakfast as always.

 

He let out a sharp breath at the cold air, almost forgetting that it was November. He tugged the sleeves over his hands, setting a brisk pace. He plugged in his headphones, popping them in and turning it up enough to hear nothing else. When he was about halfway there, something hit his back, right underneath his ribs, startling him enough to cough most of the air in his lungs out. He turned and saw a group of boys about ten or fifteen feet away, smirking evilly at him. They all had rocks in hand, and he sighed, rolling his eyes, before picking up his speed, turning and running towards the school.

 

A few rocks plummeted past him, but one hit him in the back of the knee, and another hit the nape of his neck. He fell to the ground, calling out in pain quietly. The teen heard the group approach and flinched as one kicked him.

 

“Fag,” they spit, laughing. They landed blows all over his torso, some hitting his hands as they came up to protect his head.

 

“Oi!” A voice called, causing the group to freeze. “What do you think you're doing?!”

 

The sound of the group running away. A single pair of footsteps approached him, and he heard the person laugh. “You gotta learn to protect yourself, dude,” he commented, giving a shit-eating grin to the teen as he helped him stand up.

 

He turned and glared at the helper, who, in fact, was his best friend, Alois.

 

“Shut up,” he muttered, thrusting his messenger bag into the blonde's arms, brushing the dirt off his clothes. He looked at his (once more) scraped-up palms, sighing and closing his eyes. _I'll have to bandage them again._

 

As he was adjusting the tongues of his boots, Alois elbowed him in the ribs, leaning in and hissing in his ear, “We gotta hot guy coming up to us. Don't embarrass me, bitch.”

 

He yanked his bag back from the other, strapping it over his shoulder, looking towards the direction Alois so discreetly pointed in. He was tall, with black hair, and dressed similarly to the two teens, as well. He had on short, ankle-length combat boots, grey skinny-- _skinny_ \-- jeans, and a knitted black cardigan tugged over a deep purple, baggy, tank top that showed off his protruding clavicles. A symbol of some sort hung from a long chain around his neck, the silver glinting in the winter sun.

 

The stranger approached them, asking politely, “Ah, where exactly is Durless high school?” The English accent was a shock to them both.

 

“We go there!” Alois exclaimed, smiling and clapping his hands together once. “We'll show you.”

 

“I'm Sebastian,” the stranger introduced himself, holding a hand out to Alois, not even acknowledging the other teen's presence. The blonde quietly said his name, smiling at him (almost shyly).

 

Sebastian did the same to the other teen as well, smiling at him.

 

“Hello,” he responded, slightly shy after Sebastian had been holding his hand for over a minute, resulting in him almost having to yank it out of his grasp. “I'm Ciel.”

 

And, in silence, they walked off towards the school, Alois in front of Sebastian and Ciel, who both trudged along. The blonde yipped on and on about different sights and the colour of the leaves and god-knows-all cheerfully, not noticing that the two boys behind him both put their headphones in. Eventually, somehow almost getting lost (thanks to Alois' “special talent” of amazing direction) and having to run past a long chain-fenced front yard full of yipping dogs, they made it to school, ten minutes to spare before first hour.

 

The younger duo departed, leaving Sebastian. “Maybe leaving the new kid wasn't the best idea,” Ciel realized, halfway to their lockers.

 

Alois shrugged in response, grabbing his arm impatiently. “Hurry up your slow ass!” He exclaimed, “If I'm late again I get all-day detention!” They stopped at their lockers, yanking out the needed materials and shoving the backpacks in them, slamming the doors shut, taking off towards class.

 

Class passed by quickly as he spent most of the time doodling in the margins of his notes, and he found himself having an urge to sketch Sebastian's hair, his nose, his garnet eyes. He shoved the desire away. _Honestly, Phantomhive, drawing some boy you just met. Love at first sight isn't a thing, go ahead and get that idea out, right now._

 

The bell, thankfully, rang, temporarily releasing the students from the cages they were kept in. Ciel slowly collected his books, dreading the risk of running into the group of boys from this morning. The teacher glared at him, shooing him out, and he did so slowly. At first, they were nowhere, and he walked out of the room, moving quickly, but then a blow hit his jaw, another in his stomach, causing him to hit the wall roughly, the side of his face knocking against the brick wall. He tasted blood in his mouth, and reached up to touch his lip, pulling his hand back to see his fingertips bloody.

 

He gave a small gasp, hand moving up to press against his jaw lightly. A kick hit his ribs, which he wrapped an arm around, wheezing quietly. “Stop,” he cried. “For the love of god, stop!” The group snickered, one boy reaching down to lace his fingers through his hair, yanking on his head harshly. He let go of the grip on Ciel's hair, but the teen was still left with a headache.

 

Another voice sounded, saying almost the exact same thing he did, “Stop it! Leave him alone!” The group of boys didn't bother attacking him, instead leaving as was demanded of them. Ciel almost smiled as Sebastian kneeled in front of him, the bottom of his too-big cardigan brushing the ground, reaching out a hand.

 

Graciously, he took it, rising to his feet.

 

“Woah, woah,” Sebastian said, smiling as Ciel climbed to his feet quickly. “You just got hit a bunch, might need to get your jaw x-rayed to make sure it's all cool, you might not wanna stand up so fast.” He explained softly, corralling Ciel and practically wrapping an arm around his waist to help balancing him. Ciel's heart raced, but he just thanked him quietly, allowing Sebastian to lead him to a bathroom, where he treated his lip, dabbing at it gently, his faces only a few inches away from Ciel's.

 

After he finished, he leaned back and tossed the towel into the trash. “If this ever happens again... to _anyone_... tell me.”

 

“What're you gonna do, tell on them?” Ciel replied sarcastically, smirking at Sebastian.

 

“No, you idiot, I'm gonna treat their wounds,” Sebastian said, frowning.

 

The younger's eyes widened and he lost his smirk. A silence clung to them, after that, Sebastian looking at Ciel who was staring at the tile floor, trying to ignore his pounding heart.

 

 


	2. Love Like Woe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sebastian meets Claude, and meets Ciel in a new way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello i am back with another chapter

After a moment, he stood, brushing off his jeans. “We should probably get going, we're already late enough,” Ciel said, almost nervously. “What's your next class?”

 

Sebastian pulled out a folded square of paper from his pocket, unfolding it and smoothing out the creases slightly. “Creative writing.”

 

“Me too,” Ciel said, smiling, grabbing his binders from the floor, balancing them on his knee as he slung his messenger bag on his shoulder. He snatched the older's schedule, feeling unusually giddy when he saw that they had the same classes the rest of the day. They walked out of the bathroom together, Ciel trying to ignore the pain spreading throughout him and Sebastian feeling guilty, even though he just met the boy, for not being able to prevent it.

 

As they were walking down the hall, a teacher yelled from behind them, “Why are you kids in the halls in the middle of class?”

 

Ciel froze, his eyes wide. They both turned to face her, and the younger said nervously “He's a new student, he, uh, got lost.” Sebastian glanced at him, before nodding in confirmation. The teacher glared at them, before writing them up, giving them each a note that read, _“After school detention, room 740.”_

 

They both ran to class, giggling quietly. “Shit, Sebastian, I can't believe we got detention on your first day!” Ciel exclaimed as they approached the door to the class that was almost over, anyway. They looked at each other, taking a moment to wipe the smiles from their faces. Ciel walked in before Sebastian did, going to the teacher, who was in the middle of reprimanding a student about how they are too old to mix the three “your's.”

 

Sebastian trailed after him, standing a few feet inside the room, looking at the other students and fiddling with the sleeves of his sweater anxiously. He didn't realize how uncomfortable he was without Ciel until now. Some of the kids stared back, one of them dressed in all black, wire-frame glasses, his black hair swept away from his face. The boy gazed at him without blinking, almost challengingly. Swallowing nervously, he looked away, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet.

 

The teacher walked up to him with a smile, placing a gentle hand on the small of his back and pushing him towards the front, announcing his arrival. He waved to them slightly, his fingers shaking. Sebastian cringed the way the class was silent, his boots seeming louder than usual as he passed the boy in black, hurrying to sit next to Ciel and almost letting out a sigh of relief when he did.

 

Pulling out a notebook and pen from his backpack, he quietly tore the corner of a paper off, scribbling on it, _“Who's the one in black?”_ He folded it and flicked it onto Ciel's desk, who giggled quietly.

 

 _“Claude Faustus. A fuckin weirdo, always trying to feel me up and shit,”_ was the response he received, and raised an eyebrow.

 

_“Seriously?”_

 

_“Yeah. One time, he came up to me and asked if I wanted to fuck in the bathroom.”_

 

_“Shit, man, that's weird as hell.”_

 

Ciel laughed quietly, checking to make sure the teacher's back was to them as he quickly put the piece of paper back on Sebastian's desk, saying, _“But get this, Alois is actually into that. He practically swoons over the man.”_ Right as Sebastian opened the note, the bell rang. He hurriedly dumped his things back into his backpack, but Ciel stopped him, laughing.

 

“Dude, chill out. We still have four minutes before the next class. We're gonna make it on time,” Ciel said, as Claude approached the two.

 

“Hello,” he greeted quietly, practically slithering up to the bluenette and curling an arm around his waist. “How are you, babe?”

 

“Don't you have somewhere to be, besides annoying me?” Clenching his jaw _,_ he uncoiled Claude's arm, stepping away from him and clearing his throat uncomfortably. Sebastian watched in silence, but found himself stepping closer to Ciel, almost protectively, staring the other down.

 

Claude looked Sebastian up and down, arching an eyebrow and smirking. “Find another fuckbuddy?”

 

“I don't sleep around, you stupid fuck,” Ciel growled, bristling as he slipped past him, gathering his books and rushing out of the room, Sebastian on his heels. By the end of the day, most of Sebastian had seen was Claude practically harassing Ciel, and called him out on it as he was standing by Ciel's locker, waiting for him to get his backpack so they could head to detention.

 

“What the hell is your problem? Just leave Ciel alone!” Sebastian snarled, walking up to Claude and getting in his face.

 

“Sebastian..” Ciel warned quietly, grabbing his arm and tugging him back gently. “It's whatever. It doesn't really matter.”

 

“No, Ciel, it does matter!” Sebastian yelled, pulling his arm out of Ciel's grip. “I've only been for a bloody day and half of what I've seen is you being fucking beaten up and harassed! That isn't okay!”

 

The younger went quiet, looking at the ground, biting his lip while Claude, however, just smirked and stalked away.

 

He noticed how silent Ciel went, and put a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, are you okay?”

 

Immediately swatting the hand touching him away, looking at him with almost wild eyes, he surprised both of them by how calm his voice was. “I'm fine. Let's just go.”

 

Walking in silence, they headed down to room 740, walking in the empty classroom. The teacher sat at the desk, and sighed in relief when they walked in, excusing himself to go do something, saying he'd be gone for most of detention. Ciel just sighed and nodded, waiting until he left before going to sit on his wooden desk, crossing his legs and putting his chin in his palm.

 

Right in that moment, Sebastian had the awfullest urge to kiss his pouty lips. He walked closer to the younger, his heart almost leaping up in his throat as he forced himself to stop, instead leaning against a desk in front of Ciel. “So,” he said, almost nervously, “What do you do in here, just sit and wait until they allow you to leave?”

 

Ciel shrugged slightly in response, looking to Sebastian. “I dunno, but I guess so.”

 

They remained in silence until Sebastian couldn't take it anymore, and rushed to him, pressing their lips together as he cupped his face. Keeping his eyes open to look at Ciel's, searching for a reaction, he saw them widen in surprise, before fluttering closed. Ciel kissed back softly, timidly.

 

Sebastian's other arm slid around his waist, pulling them closer, closing his own eyes, as well. His thumb stroked his cheek gently as he took the younger's bottom lip in between his own, sucking and nibbling on it. Ciel, unsure of how to respond, exactly, wrapped an arm around Sebastian's neck and let the other rest in his lap. The raven's tongue slipped past his lips and he rolled his over it.

 

The younger eventually broke the kiss, keeping his forehead pressed against Sebastian's as he gasped for breath, his hand holding to the nape of his neck. Fully realizing what just happened, finally, Ciel pulled away, looking at him with wide eyes. “We, I- haha- we shouldn't do this. I just met you,” he stuttered out.

 

Sebastian immediately pulled away, nodding and holding his hands in front of him in apology. “Fuck, I shouldn't have kissed you, I'm sorry- I just...”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you liked it, please let me know! your nice words keep my motivation up ahah


	3. Hurricane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heres a shitty rushed and sloppy chapter enjoy

Ciel laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head. “No, uh, it's all good. Not good, shit- I mean, it's fine. I don't care.” The younger tripped over his words, running his hands through his hair and staring at the ground. After a minute, he glanced at the clock, even though detention just started. He slipped from the desk, grabbing his bag. “I'll, uh, see you tomorrow,” he said quietly, leaving quickly, leaving Sebastian alone with an unquenchable urge to kiss him again.

 

The raven plopped down in a seat, putting his head down and mulling how stupid he was to completely ruin the beginning friendship. Ciel, however, sprinted home, tossing his bag down and rushing up the stairs. He threw himself on his bed, burying his face in a pillow. Kicking off his shoes, he rolled onto his back, clutching the pillow to his chest. He thought about the kiss, mortified at how he kissed back, even more so at the desire for Sebastian to kiss him again.

 

Ciel laid there for a little longer, before he closed his eyes and stood, deciding a shower might help clear his thoughts. As he walked to the bathroom, he tugged off his shirt, letting it fall to the floor in the hallway. He made the water as hot as it could be, stepping in and relishing in the way that it burned and tingled his skin.

 

The bruises that were littered across his torso positively ached, and the water pounding against them didn't make them any better. The wound on his lip broke open again and he tasted blood- while wondering absentmindedly if Sebastian tasted blood on him when he kissed him. He reached up and tenderly pressed against his jaw, hissing quietly in pain. The hot water made the scars on his thighs practically light up, and he scrunched his nose in distaste. His head began to hurt, and by the time he got out, he was feeling worse than before.

 

Popping open his medicine cabinet, he stood on his tiptoes to reach the advil and sleeping medicine. He took too much of each, before trudging to the kitchen to get a drink. He could feel the pills starting to have an effect on him as he swayed in his step on the way back to his bedroom.

 

Ciel collapsed on his bed naked, peeling back the comforter and slipping under it. He turned off his phone, forgot about homework and school, and passed out, falling into a deep, dreamless sleep.

 

He woke up to a pillow hitting his face, and rolled over, groaning quietly. He curled up, pulling the blanket over his head.

 

“Ciel, you stupid fuck, why weren't you at school? You didn't even tell me, dude!” Alois said, traveling to the other side of the bed and yanking the blanket off him completely, not even fazed by his state of undress. The boy, in response, turned over again, reaching down to grab the blanket.

 

“Let me sleep,” he groaned quietly, quickly becoming aware of the ache covering his body.

 

“Why weren't you at school? Sebastian was looking everywhere for you. I think he has a thing for you, you know,” he teased, nudging Ciel's shoulder.

 

Ciel sat up, pulling the blanket to cover his lap, his headache getting worse as he did so. “He kissed me,” he admitted, twisting the duvet in his hands.

 

The blonde's eyes widened. “Well, your little boyfriend was making out with a certain someone today.”

 

“Was it Claude?” He didn't like the sudden stab of jealousy, especially over someone he just met yesterday. Ciel frowned, biting his lip, letting out a quiet sigh when Alois nodded. “It's- It's whatever. I don't own him. Fuck, I just met him.”

 

“But I can tell that you're starting to really like him,” Alois said sympathetically. He grabbed one of Ciel's hands and squeezed it, smiling slightly.

 

“I don't like him,” he denied, shaking his head. “Just because he kissed me doesn't mean anything.”

 

“You kissed back, didn't you?”

 

“Yeah.” Ciel looked at him pathetically. “I'm so stupid.”

 

The blonde brought him into a hug, rubbing his back. “You aren't stupid,” he cooed. “Your heart is just lonely.” Though his words did little to comfort him, Ciel nodded, gnawing on his lip again. He hugged him back, before pulling away and laying back down. His stomach growled loudly, and Alois asked, “When was the last time you ate?”

 

“I don't know. Maybe two days?” Ciel said with a shrug, turning on his side and curling up. His stomach rumbled again, and he wrapped his arms around himself.

 

“You really are stupid,” he said, standing up and heading to the kitchen. “I'm going to make you food, and you better eat it.”

 

Ciel just sighed, putting a pillow over his head and squeezing his eyes shut. He reached over and grabbed his phone, moving the pillow down to rest on his stomach, and turned it back on, almost wincing as he saw the 10 texts from Alois. He tossed it to the other side of the bed, staring at the ceiling. The blonde came in a minute later with a bowl of cereal, thrusting it in his hands and practically force feeding him. Halfway through, he pushed it away, claiming quietly, “I'm full.”

 

“So you're stupid and a liar,” he mumbled, pushing the bowl back to him. “If you haven't eaten in two days, half a bowl of cereal isn't gonna fill you up, Ciel.”

 

He bit his lip and looked away. “I just- I just don't want to eat, alright?”

 


	4. The Kids Aren't Alright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ciel relapses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warning for self harm   
> that is all enjoy the read

Alois frowned and sat back. “Why not?” His frown deepened as he saw his friend’s nails scratch lightly at his thigh. “Stop,” he chided, like a mother with her child, reaching out and pulling Ciel’s hand away, “Don’t do that.” He knew Ciel used to cut (but didn’t know he still did), and worried over him insistently.

Ciel, out of instinct, immediately yanked his hand back. He looked down at the slightly pink skin, and felt himself positively itching to rip himself open. “Sorry,” he mumbled, reluctantly finishing his food. Though his stomach felt quite better after doing so, he still felt shitty for eating. He nearly sighed in relief when Alois stood and announced that he had to go home, because his mom would kill him and assume he was in detention for not showing up at home at a certain time. He tensed when Alois gave him a hug, not feeling in the right mental stability for physical contact. Alois smiled sadly and muttered an apology, before taking his leave.

The ashen-haired boy lay back, nearly knocking the now empty bowl off his bed. He wouldn’t’ve cared, anyway, so he stretched fully out and felt somewhat satisfied at the dull thud the glass made as it hit the carpet. After waiting until he was positively sure that Alois was gone (a completely painful twenty minutes, if you asked him), Ciel got up and went into the kitchen, rummaging around in the different drawers until he came across exactly what he wanted- _needed_ \- a shiny pair of scissors.

He plopped down, right there, hardly noticing the pain spiking through him as he hit the tile. Ciel lightly dragged the blades across the skin on his right thigh, shivering as he practically teased himself with the near pleasure and anticipation of the metal breaking his skin. His thoughts roamed lazily, and they landed on Sebastian _making out wit h Claude_ (and not himself), and the sudden anger and near jealousy raining down upon him, swimming through his veins and running up his spine, caused his grip on the handle to tighten, pressing harder, harder, _harder_ , until he felt the sweet release of the soft skin towards the inside of his thigh slicing in half.

A shudder and a breathy gasp, a strangled and indifferent breath, escaped him, and he did it again, and again, and again, until the white tile underneath him had blood pooling in the cracks, and the crimson was smeared across his creamy skin. Ciel, after finding his leg was beginning to hurt even further and that his vision was nearly blurring, set the scissors down on the counter above him, placing his hand on the edge to help pull himself to his feet. He hobbled to the bathroom, and wet a towel, hissing in pain as the warm and wet material pressed against the open wounds.

Slowly, so slowly it made the pain even more agonizing, he washed away the blood, looking in horror at some cuts that gaped wide open. Afterwords, he bandaged himself up tight, and dressed in baggy sweatpants, before taking a couple sleeping pills and falling into bed again.

Alois’ call woke him up the next day. He rolled over and nearly screamed at the pain, taking a moment to clear his throat and calm himself down before answering.

“What?” His voice was scratchy from nearly fifteen hour of sleep.

“School. Wake the fuck up and meet me in the usual spot.” He scoffed when he was hung up on, and sighed, knowing that the homework he’d have to do if he missed any more school would’ve been absolute Hell (more so than usual).

Ciel dragged himself out of bed and clenched his teeth when he unwrapped his leg, the cotton material pressed against the skin sticking, biting down on his tongue as he ripped it off. Most had scabbed over, or were in the process of doing so. He nearly regretted doing it.

After managing to get dressed, he brushed his teeth and straightened his hair out somewhat, sliding his two favorite rings on, before starting to walk to meet Alois. Surprisingly, not only did he manage to get there unscathed, but also, the blonde wasn’t there, instead, rather, Sebastian. He sighed, really not wanting to talk to him, looking away when Sebastian approached him with a smile.

“Hey. You weren’t here yesterday. I was worried.”

“Just didn’t feel well,” he mumbled in reply, wincing when Sebastian’s hand accidentally brushed his thigh.

“Does your jaw hurt too much? Or anywhere else, really.”

“Hurts like a son of a bitch,” Ciel answered, smiling slightly, crossing his arms over his stomach and letting out a breath, watching it appear in the frigid air.

“Oh.” Sebastian was silent for a moment, staring down at his shoes, looking at the shiny leather. “Sorry. For.. For everything, you know.”

Ciel just shrugged and looked away. He didn’t want to talk about it. It made him feel like he had a chance with a guy. Most guys he dated would just use him and leave a few days later, but Sebastian.. Sebastian was just so kind and good-hearted, he couldn’t possibly imagine him being an asshole. “It’s whatever. Is Alois gonna be here soon?”

He coughed awkwardly, and sighed softly, eventually looking up at Ciel again. “I guess not. We should get going. We’ll be late if we don’t go.”

The younger nodded and trailed after him, staring at his hands and having the awfullest urge to hold them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry for late update
> 
> here is my tumblr- http://whoreos420.tumblr.com/


	5. Hallelujah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm sitting pretty in my brand new scars.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so so sorry for such a long wait. lots of things are going on but im going to try to write and update regularly.

Most of school passed by uneventfully. Because of Sebastian two days ago, very little people decided to pick fights with Ciel. Alois didn’t show up, and Sebastian stuck to Ciel’s side as much as he could. They sat together at lunch, and he looked skeptical when Ciel didn’t eat anything whatsoever.

And it got a little worse when Sebastian pointed it out, offering him some of his own lunch, of which the younger politely declined.

Ciel watched Sebastian through his bangs, and he really really wanted to ask him if he really did kiss Claude, but he just couldn’t.. He didn’t know why. During their last class, which they were doing a partnered project in, Sebastian caught him staring, giving Ciel a funny look. The boy blushed just a tad, and quickly looked back down to his paper, pretending to work on boring poetry he had no interest in.

“Is everything okay, Ciel?” Sebastian asked after a moment, reaching across the desk to tap the back of his hand.

He immediately glanced up at him, from his concerned features to their hands, pulling his off the table to rest on his lap. Ciel’s fingers brushed over the cuts and he covered his grunt in pain with a cough into the crook of his elbow. “I’m fine. Keep working, this stupid thing’s due Friday.” And it was Wednesday. They were less than halfway done. The teacher wouldn’t give them extra time, even though Sebastian was new, technically it would be fair to give the two extra time so that he could learn the subject and get comfortable with it before they started the project, but no. Real life waits for no one, Ciel supposed.

Sebastian stared at him for a moment longer, before nodding and looking back down to his paper, resuming his work. Something was up with Ciel, he knew it. Between skipping yesterday and acting so.... off, today, something must be wrong. He really hoped it wasn’t because he kissed him on Monday. Sebastian didn’t want to ruin the beginning of their friendship.

He peered up from his paper, seeing Claude looking at him, and he was more than angry when he flushed just a little. The kiss they had yesterday... It was a mistake, to say the least. He didn’t even want to kiss Claude (okay, maybe just a teeny tiny bit). He was at his locker getting his things for second period when he was pinned against the wall, and, despite his attempts to push him away, was kissed. Claude didn’t move away until he kneed in him in the crotch.

Sebastian narrowed his eyes at him, efficiently earning a smirk from the other, before getting back to work, his pencil scratching against the paper quietly as he wrote quickly, wanting to finish this damned project. Towards the end of class, he looked up at Ciel again, finding him staring at his lap instead of the paper on the desk before him. “We might need to meet up after school tomorrow to finish this.”

The bandages under his jeans shifted and he could see where the denim rubbed against one of the half healed cuts until it began to bleed again. Ciel stiffened when he saw that, and was trying to pinch the end of the bandage through his pants to pull it back up, head shooting up when Sebastian spoke. He didn’t want to meet him after school. Last time they were together, Sebastian kissed him, and, after he kissed Claude, (Ciel was mostly sure that) he didn’t want to kiss Sebastian again. “I don’t know. Maybe. Hopefully we’ll be able to finish this tomorrow,” he mumbled, most of his voice drowned out by the chatter of the class.

Sebastian didn’t really hear him, but he didn’t want to make Ciel repeat himself, having the vibe that he was in a bad mood today. Maybe that’s what’s wrong. He was just in a bad mood. So, though he didn’t quite catch what the boy said, he nodded and got back to work without further word.

The bell rung and Ciel was quick to tuck his papers into his binder, before shoving it in his backpack. He stood, grateful that the ever growing stain was at perfect level with his palm. Ciel rested his hand over it, and smiled politely at Sebastian, muttering out a farewell, before hurrying to leave. It wasn’t until he was finally alone in his apartment that he let himself hiss in pain at the growing ache in his thigh. “Shit, shit shit..”

He dropped his backpack by the door and kicked his shoes off, making his way to the bathroom. Pulling off his pants, he yelped, biting his lip as the hem of his jeans brushed his wounds. Ciel undressed fully and turned on the shower, trying his damnedest to ignore the sting as he washed himself. With shaking hands, he slowly, carefully, cleaned the cuts on his leg, letting out pants and gritting his teeth as he did so. Two or three of them reopened throughout the day, and were bleeding in earnest. Blood ran down the inside of his thigh, and he ended up turning off the shower and sitting on the edge of the tub, watching drops of crimson drip onto the porcelain.

Ciel, once he was done, wrapped his right thigh quickly, the pressure pressing against the injuries stopping the blood flow and stifling the pain just a tad. He dressed in last night’s sweatpants, and took some pain medicine, seeing the sleeping pills right beside them in the cabinet. The boy was very tempted to take them and fall into a dreamless sleep once more, but he repressed the urge, going back downstairs, picking up his backpack.

Once he settled on his bed, he opened up his bag and resumed working on the project. After half an hour, he decided he’d worked on it enough for one night, and did the rest of his homework (in actuality, Ciel only worked on a single worksheet, and didn’t even finish one side of it). He laid down and pulled out his phone, plugging it in, busying himself with playing mindless games. By the time he’d finally gotten bored, the sun had just finished setting. His phone buzzed and he groaned in annoyance, not in the mood to talk to anyone. It was an unknown number (scratch that, it was Sebastian).

 

**8:47 PM**

**was wondering if I could come over after school tomorrow to work on the project with you?**

 

Ciel frowned at the text, and locked his phone once more, resting it on his stomach, right in the center of his ribcage, as he thought. He wanted to be friends with Sebastian, yes, most certainly, and he almost wanted to kiss him again, but the thought of kissing makes him think of Claude and his stomach absolutely turns. It was to work on a project, after all, surely nothing would happen. He had almost the exact same thought on Monday before detention. The boy debated for longer than he probably should’ve.

 

_[text to: Sebastian]_

_8:58 PM_

_depends. we might finish tomorrow_

 

**[text from: Sebastian]**

**8:58 PM**

**we probably won’t though**

 

He felt annoyed both by the message and how quickly Sebastian replied, for reasons he wasn’t quite sure of. Then again, with Sebastian, he wasn’t too sure of many things. Ciel opted to simply not reply, and instead set his alarms on his phone for tomorrow (bright and fucking early), turning onto his side, ignoring the pain in his thigh. His phone went off again right as he was almost asleep, and his eyes cracked open, a sleepy growl escaping him in annoyance.

 

**[text from: Sebastian]**

**9:23 PM**

**helloooooo?**

 

 

_[text to: Sebastian]_

_9:23 PM_

_i wS almos t Sleep i hTe u_

 

Sebastian, sitting on his own bed, laptop burning into his thighs, let out a soft laugh and decided to leave Ciel alone, locking his phone and setting it beside him.


End file.
